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Hi all. My partner and I have been together for four years and we were starting to talk about getting engaged. Up until recently, we were aligned in our desire to stay and raise our family here. In fact, when I did decide I wanted kids a few years back, it was on the condition that I raise them here.

However he had a big life event that has caused him to start rethinking everything. He’s very worried about money if we chose the path of staying in nyc, and thinks we’ll get stuck ‘keeping up with the Jones’s’, working ourselves too hard to be able to provide a good life for our kids.

I’ve spent years considering this as well as talking to nyc parents I meet and asking their perspectives. I admittedly am less cost minded than him but I feel like I don’t need to make a ton of money to provide my kids with a nice life and that the pros outweigh the cons. I want to raise confident, smart, worldly, independent kids and I absolutely dread the idea of living in the suburbs.

I always saw staying in New York as a non-negotiable for me, but this is the person I love so I want to try to understand his perspectives and see if I could be open to other paths.

However I think it would be really helpful to hear from New York parents and even kids who grew up in New York – what do you like about raising your family here? What do you dislike? Have you lived anywhere else and how did it compare? How much do you feel like a household has to make combined to provide their kids a comfortable life in New York?